My Grand Illusions

Well, that was fun

Hi! Did you know I lived in Texas? Did you know that it doesn't hardly ever snow and that it never snows on Christmas day? Well Texas was all feeling left out of the loop what with all the snow all over the country (and the world, Hi my UK people!) so it decided to show off and dump snow us via the windiest blizzard I've ever been in. Granted, I've never been in a blizzard, but it was sort of how I expected it to be. Ass-cold and crazy.

I drove in that crap for what should have been a short 25-minute car ride to get Jackson and go back home. But no, that would have been too easy. It took me over an hour-and-a-half to make that drive. I felt like I was in a video game, dodging cars that had gotten stuck on hills, trying my best to see when snow was literally blowing sideways and having idiots around me think that their little 2-seater cars wouldn't fly across the road when they slammed their breaks on. Whoa buddy, it was crazy out there.

Despite the crazy people, it was really lovely to see Jackson eat cup after cup of snow. We had a blast throwing snowballs at each other. We weren't fully prepared for a snowball fight so Jackson wore his younger cousin's pink gloves and I was decked out in pajama bottoms and an old pair of brown boots that I never use but that came in quite handy.

It's supposed to snow some more this week and I'm sort of excited about it. More eating of the snow! More snowball fights! I've now been properly schooled on how to make a snowball using my bare hands. I've been taught, over the phone, how to pack it in so it doesn't fall apart when thrown and how to make 2 or 3 at a time so you have some to spare. Fortunately my only competition at this moment is Jackson and I am a tad bit older than he is so I think no matter what my snowballs look like I'll probably win. So maybe we'll just build a snowman.

It was a lovely Christmas with (most of) my family. I was missing a few people that couldn't be here but I was able to talk with everyone that I wanted to on Christmas day, a few of those people I talked to several times. I got a few small gifts that I'm excited about. And my kids made out like bandits, as usual. Momma's got to get stuff ready to be donated to make some room!

The New Year is right around the corner which means that tax season is not far away either. Of course this means I'll be working my ass off to save enough money to live off of for the rest of the year. I'll be scarce around these parts, same as every year. But I'll be back often enough. I could never leave for good!

I hope everyone had a lovely Christmas!

Goodreads

I'm a huge fan of reading. I'll read most anything if it's good. I like autobiographies, fiction, self-help, anthologies, anything. The problem with reading though, for me, is that my memory fails me quite often. I have favorite books and I can tell you about them but I often can't remember the title or the author and I wanted a way to keep track of what I've read. Enter Goodreads.

I've actually been a member since January 2008 and I've got a handful of friends but I'm always on the look out for more. Are you on Goodreads? Are we friends on Goodreads? If you aren't on Goodreads, go! sign up! be my book reading friend! Go to my profile and make me your friend.

If you aren't on Goodreads, tell me what books you've read this year that you loved. I'm always in the market to fill up more space in my bookcase.

Here are a few of my favorite books that I read in 2009:

The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri

Such an easy read with characters I really enjoyed.

Freedom in Exile: The Autobiography of Dalai Lama by Dalai Lama XIV

This book makes me want to go to TIbet. I found this book so fascinating and now I want to know more about the Tibetans and the Dalia Lama.

A Gesture Life: A Novel by Chang-Rae Lee

A great story that really made me think about my own life.

The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan

I'll never look at mushrooms the same again.

People of the Book by Geraldine Brooks

This is probably up there in my top 10 favorite books. 

City of Thieves by David Benioff

I just finished this yesterday. Usually when I finish a book it goes in the pile to be sold or donated or listed on Paper Back Swap*. I love this book so much that I'm keeping it and adding it to my list of favorite books of all time. I may even re-read it which is something I rarely do.

I've read more than just these books in 2009. These are just a few of the books I've enjoyed. I hope to read a few more books in 2010. I have a goal of around 30-ish books. I definitely have enough books at home that I've not read to accomplish that goal. Perhaps I should have a goal to not purchase anymore books until I've read the ones I do have. Perhaps.

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If you go to and join Paperbackswap.com, list me as your referrer, please! I'll get a credit! This site is awesome for swapping books for free (minus the postage). I highly recommend it.

I'm back. With a tan. (And announcing a winner!)

So, I'm back from my vacation in the Bahamas. It was a lovely little get-away that I needed. I feel like I'm ready to take on this tax season full force. We had 5 days of lounging on the beach, eating way too much, talking a lot and just relaxing. I'd sort of like to say that we stayed up late and partied like rock stars but honestly we went to bed at a decent hour every night and the most I had to drink was 1 1/2 mojitos in South Beach that gave me the slightest little buzz, enough to make me tired.

All of the beaches we went to were blanketed with off-white sand that fed into brilliant, clear blue water. The warm sun on my skin was a nice departure from sweaters and scarves and shivering. I had never vacationed in the warm tropical weather during Christmas time. It was so disconcerting to be walking around in a bathing suit, layers of sunscreen applied to my limbs all while seeing plastic Santa's and 20 foot Christmas trees. Oh, but it was lovely.

While I was away I held a giveaway that a few people entered. (Where IS EVERYONE?!) I wanted to give away a fantastic travel journal/organizer that I used on my trip. Honestly, it was a great way to keep track of everything we did, things we liked and hated, places we'd come back to, food we ate and how proud I was that we actually brought our workout clothes and managed to squeeze in three really good workouts during our trip. I'm looking forward to looking back on my journaling and reading all about this vacation.

So! The winner! Using a random number selector who's-it, the winner is Natalie, from The Sweets Life. Natalie, please send me an e-mail by Friday to mygrandillusions [at] yahoo dot com and I'll get the awesome travel organizer/journal to you!

Also, it wouldn't be a proper I'M BACK post without a few pictures...

Me and my big hair posing on the ships deck with smoggy Miami in the background.

 
 Oh Internet, here I am in a bathing suit. Granted it's not a regular one, it totally has a skirt attached to it and I'm ok with that. I felt better than if I had pranced around in a "regular" suit. Momma's got thighs. The water was really THIS blue and THIS gorgeous.

Oh Christmas tree....Here I am in a swimsuit cover-up and flip flops in front of a Christmas tree. The irony was not lost on me. Or my tan (which I know is hard to see, my Italian roots are not showing themselves.)

 
 I wish I was back here RIGHT NOW.

There are a TON MORE photos here. You can see my gorgeous friend and her enviable hot self in her bikini and me in my skirted swimsuit. I am so lame! Ha!

While I'm away...You could win!

So, I've set this to auto-post because, my friends, I'm away on a short 4 day cruise to the Bahamas and a one night stay in South Beach Miami in an adorable hotel that's literally steps from the ocean with one of my girlfriends. We're probably lounging by the cruise ship pool or soaking up the sun (with a proper amount of sunblock on) at the beach. It's my last hoorah for the year before the crazy hours of tax season set in.

I'm especially excited to travel with the person I'm traveling with. Her name is Chandler and I've known her for years. We went to elementary school together, liked the same boys and rode many a school bus together. We lost contact for quite a few years so I'm especially glad to have reconnected with her.

While I'm traveling I've got a new way to record memories from my trip. I posted about this over at Style Lush, go check it out! I bought the most awesome little travel journal/organizerthat I HIGHLY recommend if you are traveling anywhere, really. It's jam packed with information, inspiration and a ton of space to journal about your travels. I fully intend on getting one for each vacation I take from now on.

I love this little travel journal so much that I'm going to give away one for free! Leave me a comment telling me what your favorite way is to keep track of your travels. I'll pick a winner when I come back and announce who wins on Monday!

Until then, hold down the Internet, please!

The 'B' word

If you read post about traveling in 2010, you'll know that I've got some vacations I'm planning. Two are in the works and another has been discussed briefly. To be able to go on vacations it's usually pretty important to have money to fund it. Unfortunately I am not independently wealthy (WHY?!) and do not know anyone that is (AGAIN< WHY!?), so I have to save and scrimp and put my pennies in a jar. My travel plans this upcoming year are quite lofty so this means I'll need a larger sum of savings than usual.

Tax season is coming which means I'll be working my ass off and I'll be able to stash some money aside for these trips. But I need to make sure I also save enough to pay for the small things, like my mortgage and food. This means I'll have to cut some corners in my spending also to accomplish the goal of travels, having a place to live and eating. I've considered cutting out all but the essentials before to help pay my house off earlier. I thought about canceling my cable, internet, home phone and other "luxuries" that I could live without. But I know me and I know I like to watch Top Chef on cable and I like to be able to get on the internet at home from a computer. But I've been making a mental list of the things I can do to save a buck or two and really make the most of what I've got.

• I need a grocery budget. I did a 30 days grocery budget spending only $100 for the month and I did well. I only went over a few bucks so I know I can do it. I think I'll make a more reasonable budget of $200 a month. Savings would be approximately $100 a month.
• Cancel my Netflix membership. I used to watch Netflix movies and shows all the time and now I never do. I've had the same three DVD's sitting on my desk for two months. That'll save $15 a month.
• Pay off that last credit card. Technically this won't save me much money but I'll save the interest and have that monthly amount I am paying to set aside.  $75 a month savings.
• Give myself an allowance. As it stands I just buy what I want when I want it if I can can afford it. Some months I might spend $20 on myself, others I might spend $200. I need a consistent budget for frivolous purchases. No one needs 3 new handbags at once. Approximate savings, let's say $100.

Total savings per month, approximately : $285

That's not a lot but its a good start. That's an airplane ticket to New York or a few night's stay in a hotel or enough to have some spending money on a vacation. If I'm being honest with myself I really just need to work a butt-load of hours at work for those few months and then I'll be set for the rest of the year. It's just so so so daunting for some reason. I'm not cut out for 15 hour work days, 6 days a week for almost 4 months.

But I'm going to buckle down and suck it up and git 'er done for the sake of a fun-filled traveling year that won't leave me homeless with no food. Perhaps that can be my New Year's Resolution. Just get it done and then relax for the rest of the year. Without whining....that's the real goal.

The things I won't compromise on

Remembering who you are as a singular being in a relationship is a challenge for a lot of people I think. It's hard to not throw yourself full-force into the likes and activities of the significant other in your life and remember to do the things that make you you. My relationship status is, well, complicated. I'm definitely not taken and I'm definitely not feeling single. But I am feeling that spark of something happening. It's all so very exciting and new a feeling I haven't felt in a long long long time, years really.

This is extremely preemptive but I wanted to make a list of the things I am not willing to compromise on. Things that, no matter what, I believe in and I never want to change, no matter if I end up with someone or alone for the rest of my life. I want to make sure I stay true to myself so I can be happy.

Family. I won't again be with someone who doesn't regard their family as one of the most important things in their life. It seems like such an easy, natural thing but I learned that some people just don't value their families like I think they should be valued. That's not to say that we all don't need a break from our families sometimes. But it should be a given that if you've got family close by that you make the attempt to spend time with them on occasion.

Travel. I don't need to travel to far away places for weeks and weeks but I do like to get away for a bit, to escape real life. I want to be able to do that without having to worry about having someone who doesn't want to ever leave the safety bubble they've created. No, I won't drag someone on a vacation again, I need a willing partner.

Laughter. After it's all said and done there's got to be laughter. Lots and lots of laughter. I won't settle for someone with no sense of humor.

My children. If you can't hang with my kids than basically we're done. That's that.

Honesty, integrity and dependability. That's a tall order, except it's really not. Everyone deserves to get the truth, to be able to depend on others and expect others to be true to themselves.

Personal space. I think everyone needs their little bit of personal space to do what makes them happy. I want to always be able to go read a book or have lunch with a girlfriend or even just take a nap. I want to do these things without feeling guilty. I also want to make sure that I can give that personal space without being clingy or needy.

Love. You'd think this would be the easy one. But not for me. Simply put, all I want is someone who loves me for me.

We'll see if anyone's up for such a demanding order...

Where else should I go in 2010?

I'm planning my vacations for 2010 already and I'm so excited about where I have planned to go so far. I've always loved to travel and see new places and meet new people. I like getting out of my safe little world and seeing how the other half lives, it humbles me and really centers me.

Not until this past year have I really traveled a great distance without my entire family with me. I love traveling with my family, don't get me wrong, but it's also nice to travel with dear friends. I made my way to California for a fun-filled time with some really excellent ladies. Four days of Vegas left me with fun memories and some wicked hangovers and in less than 2 weeks I leave for a cruise to the Bahamas. It's been an awesome travel-filled year and I hope to repeat it again every year from now on.

So far for 2010 I have two trips planned. I'm working out the details likes dates and accommodations, but I'm 99.9% sure these trips will indeed happen. I'm on flight watch right now to get the best deal.

In May or June I am planning a trip to England. It's quite a long, odd story so I'll do my best. My (step) dad has family in the UK. His mother, my step-grandmother, didn't approve of me or my mom, for whatever reason, so I never really knew his family. He's just recently gotten in regular contact with them. My parents have been to visit his family in England twice now and for Thanksgiving three of his cousins came here to visit us and I enjoyed them all so much that I want to go visit. Plus, I was looking at pictures of Wales and the beautiful mountains and hiking trails and I was sold. I'm thinking of going there for 2-3 weeks.

The other trip I've got planned is in August. BlogHer 2010 is in NY this year and I LOVE ME SOME NY. I'll go there for any occasion. I'm planning on taking Derick with me so he can hang out with his two cousins that live there. They are all about the same age so I think he'd really like spending time with them. I may or may not attend the actual BlogHer conference, but I would like to see everyone that's there. One of my dad's cousins talked about maybe going to NY at the same time and meeting me there. He's never been and really wants to go. Either way, I'll be there. For sure.

I'd like to take a vacation in December in addition to the above places I'm going. I'm thinking maybe somewhere beachy, or maybe even somewhere with snow for skiing. That's where you come in.

Tell me your favorite vacation spots, beachy or wintery. Someplace that you'd go to again and again. Help me decide where to go!

A whirlwind week

It's been a whirlwind week full of family, firsts, sight-seeing, eating a lot and really just having a great time. I took Derick to the airport this morning which means that everyone who came into town for the holidays is officially gone and back at home. I'm filled with a sense of the blues because everyone is so far away. If I could, I'd make everyone move here and stay for good.

This year marks the most amount of people we've had over for Thanksgiving ever. An Aunt flew in from Ohio and her daughter, my cousin, came in from South Carolina. One set of grandparents came from Missouri and another from Austin. Derick came in from Pennsylvania and my Dad's cousins came all the way from England.

I stayed up later than I usually do, often past 2 AM and then got ready the very next day at 8 or 9 AM. I am exhausted and ready to hibernate for a year. But it really was all worth it to see everyone. I didn't get around to writing an "I'm Thankful for..." post so here's my belated list:

• I'm thankful that my family is loud and crazy and chaotic. I wouldn't have them any other way.
• I'm thankful I have the means to fly Derick home on a pretty regular basis. It does my heart good to spend time with him even though he's far away.
• I'm thankful that my dad's cousins accept me and my children despite the fact that we're not blood-related. One of their Aunts did not accept us because of the above reason.
• I'm thankful for the Internet and social media sites so I can keep up with family and friends on a regular basis and also because I've met some amazing people using those avenues.
• I'm thankful that my family has no worries about food shortages or housing or other things some people have to worry about. We really are lucky.
• I'm thankful for the great family and friends I have, you all make me who I am and I truly believe you all make me a better person.

There are thousands of photos from this past week. I've picked a few that I really like.

This was the morning of Thanksgiving with my Aunt and Grandma.

 We couldn't let people go home without having a true Texas experience on a fake bull at Billy Bob's. Yeehaw. 

 
Me and Duvain (and some random guy) at the new Cowboy's stadium. That place is MASSIVE.

The Stockyards.

A little Guitar Hero was in order.

Happy belated Thanksgiving. I hope you and your's had a lovely time.